I’ve been trying to figure out what I want to do with my future and here’s my conclusion: I have no clue.
When you leave college or university, everyone says, “Congratulations! Good luck and have fun!” What they don’t tell you is that being a young adult sucks at times because:
a) you have not a clue what you are doing,
b) finding a job is really hard and you’re probably going to end up with something that isn’t you’re dream job (unless you are very lucky…or blessed as I like to think of it), and
c) there is no guide book to how to transition from the carefree days of college to the suddenly-shoved-in-your-face, responsibility filled days of young adulthood.
Don’t get me wrong, I like my life. I have been blessed with some of the most phenomenal opportunities in my 22 years on this Earth.
But no one told me that the barriers and curtains between you and your dreams begin to look like mountains and fortresses when you begin to understand just how difficult and sad and frustrating the world can be.
And yet, in the same breath, I can say I am so glad I am 22. There’s an Anberlin song that says we are old enough to know but too young to care. I know that my dream of going to film or drama school and making movies for the rest of my life is crazy and unrealistic. But I’m still young enough to say, “To hell with reality! I’m gonna dream big.”
I guess what all of this is teaching me is that life is a balance. Life is good and bad, sad and joyful, horrific and glorious. Life is everything we love, hate, wish we could change, wish we were, wish we weren’t-everything tied up into a poorly wrapped present. Life doesn’t always look pretty. But like the hand wrapped gift given by a small child, it doesn’t matter that the tape doesn’t stick or that the ribbon is falling off.
Because the most important part of a gift is the thing you cannot see.